It seems there are more people into BDSM than just spanking, or Domestic Discipline. To me BDSM is more of a play fantasy escape that couples or people share from time to time. I think if you say you're into BDSM it's safer than saying you're into, or participate in Domestic Discipline, HOH, spanking.
I've talked to a lot of Spankers and spankees over the years and many still don't understand the dynamic of spanking in context with Domestic Discipline. Many will have this idea that it's abuse.
Every couple, when getting married, take vows. The promise to do this and that and so on and so on. They've most likely had many talks with each other about how their married life will be, or at least dream it will be. There are hundreds of thousands, if not millions, of couples out there who took their vows and agreed on a great deal of things that would and wouldn't happen in their marriage but had know idea that their spouse would get drunk and beat them regularly. Or that they had an anger problem and would take out their anger on them and the children. The list can go on and on.
So, when my wife and I first got together it was understood that I spanked. She agreed with my philosophy that from time to time a wife needed to go across her husband's lap for more than just one reason. Believe me, my wife is a strong independent woman and if she didn't want to get spanked she would be able to fight it. Since, I don't believe in physically taking her across my lap it is something she has to submit to. In other words, I either send her to our room and tell her I'll be in there shortly. In which she bares her bottom and waits for me to come in and administer her spanking. Or I will tell her I'll meet her in our room. In that case I'm sitting on the edge of the bed, she comes in and strips from the waist down and puts herself across my lap for her spanking. Neither of us see NO abuse there.
In addition, for me, each time that happens I gain a tremendous amount of respect for her.