I never thought I'd say this but, "In my day..."
I'm on Fetlife at least twice a day checking threads and I'm amazed at comments I've heard from guys who say they can't find that special someone. I even read that from women too.
The internet has been around for over 40 years now but as for all of us using it like we do today it's only been around 15 years. The ability to connect to like minded people as increased 100% every year since then. If I had the internet, in my day, in my 20's I can't even fathom were I'd be today.
For years I thought I was the only one on the planet that felt the way I do about spanking. If I was 22 all over again and I wanted to know if there were others who felt as I do I would be instantly connected to thousands, 10's of thousands and even more.
I had to be pretty bold, looking back now, to date only women who understood spanking in a lifestyle. Since 1993, for example, there's only been one woman I can think of who didn't accept my spanking lifestyle.
I still remember telling her she was going to get spanked and when she did get that first and only spanking. Which was no butt burner, believe me. Anyway, a few days later she called and very nicely said that she didn't believe adults should punish or get punished that way. I then remarked that, "Does that mean you're not willing to be spanked again?" And she said yes to my question.
To her surprise I then calmly and in a very nice tone told her that I wished her all the best in life and hoped that she would one day find her special someone. She then replied, "What a minute, you're breaking up with me?"
She was sure that by telling me about her feeling regarding spanking that I would just NOT spank her every again, but keep the relationship. Well, first off she needed her bottom spanked on a regular basis and there was no way I would be dating her another day and not put her across my lap when she needed it. Second, I vowed never again to date anyone who didn't understand my feelings about spanking.
None of us really have to put up with not having that special someone in our lives, especially today. However, for some guys I do understand that it can be difficult. If you're an Asshole, have No sense of humor, look for every and any reason to spank or punish, smell badly and or you're a narcissist and believe the world revolves around you, then no wonder it's hard to find someone. It's not that you spank or want a DD or HOH relationship it's that you're a jerk and an Asshole plain and simple.
I have found that those who want a kinky lifestyle want the same things Vanilla relationships want too. No one is going to want a relationship with me, for very long for sure, if I'm lurking around every corner to discipline them. If I'm setting ridiculous rules even a goddess or god couldn't follow. If I'm boring to be around because I have no sense of humor or only take one shower a week then why would someone want a long term or any term relationship?
Sounds like common sense, but it is amazing that some people think they can act like a jerk and still get someone to have a relationship with.
ReplyDeleteLove,
Kitty
P.S. I'm enjoying your story:).
Hi Iam really enjoying your blog, I started to spank my wife about 5 months ago and this has been the best thing to ever happen to me. All the relationships I have had have sucked the women try to control everything and my wife was getting that way to until I said I was leaving, then she went on the computer for advice and stumbled across LDD. Gotta say I wasent into it she forced me saying it was gonna be one last try at our relationship, so I tied her to the bed post and whipped her ass black and blue with my belt this went on for about 30mins I lost myself in it..When I was done something happened that I cant explain but we held eachother and and loved eachother and there was no turning back at that point this is what we were looking for ..She then started showing me things on the pc like how I was raised by all women that I did not know how to be a man how to act like a real man and take control she showed me how by making me the HOH ,and now I have something I never had before I have my manhood may sound corny but its true. I have never felt so right so complete..I made a list of rules with in a month we started a boot camp now I have the respect I deserve we no longer talk about leaving eachother some times we will go a week with no spankings other times I spank her 2 to 3 times a day depending on what she needs from me she has given me consent for non consensual spankings where weather she likes it or not she gets one she always thanks me after ..The one thing that I do find that works for us is on sundays she gets a 1 hour spanking I spank with different implements for 15 mins she gets a break for 5 then we start again until the hour has passed just a reminder of our roles ..This woman was a nightmare spoiled mouthy sloppy disrespectful and now fuck she is the woman of my dreams she has told me that it also has given her her womanhood back she no longer feels the stress of being independent or strong she can be the woman she wants to be and let me worry about everything else she has started to wear dresses and aprons she loves them she said if it wasent for winter she would throw away her jeans..anyways thats it I guess just wanted to let you know how things on my end are thanks Adam,Canada
ReplyDeleteIf there is any secret to spanking a woman for the first time, it is to confront the woman when SHE knows she deserves it AND, as in the case of the wife above, SHE wants to maintain the relationship. Timing is paramount.
ReplyDeleteAs with many things in a woman's life, SHE has to believe/know/understand it is about HER. Women are much more inclined to treat spanking as a form of rape if they sense it is an excuse for male domination. Although they are part of the same experience, it is also important for the man to understand that how a woman feels AFTER the spanking is more important that how SHE feels going into it.
Unless a woman is "into the lifestyle," first spankings are often awkward affairs. After all, if things were going smoothy in the first place, there wouldn't be any need to spank! Even if a woman is looking for a disciplinary relationship, the first spanking has to coincide with HER expectations.
Three examples of a man meeting a woman's expectations both just happened to involve divorcees. None of the women had been spanked by their first husbands.
A self-confessed city prima donna looking for a change of scenery recalled winding up bare bottomed over a hard-handed cowboy's knee before she realized what was happening to her. By the time her then boyfriend finished with her, she was thoroughly embarrassed and very much in love with a man she originally thought beneath her.
After a good lecture regarding her use of profanity in the living room, a mother admitted voluntarily preceding her lover into the bedroom knowing she was going to get an old-fashioned switch bend around her bare bottom. Not only did she confess to feeling clean inside afterwards, she admitted it only took once to clean up her vocabulary!
Although admittedly searching for a man able to discipline her, a young woman was never satisfied with the outcomes until, after a frank discussion, her future husband made her drop her pants, bend over a bed and, take a spanking with his belt. For the first time since she was a girl, she acknowledged losing control and really crying out years of pent up frustrations.
When dealing with a woman aware of what will do her some good, timidity is not a virtue. Women usually know, much better than do men, that getting a good hard spanking when she needs it makes a woman love and respect the man able to handle her.